What Is EMDR-Informed Coaching? Moving From Therapy Towards Future Goals

Therapy often begins because something doesn’t feel right.

Clients often come to see me because they are struggling with worry or feeling sad. Things that happened in the past keep replaying, there are problems in relationships or patterns that seem to keep repeating. At first, the focus of sessions is often on listening, validating and understanding what happened. Work then moves towards finding a way to reduce suffering and finding a way to feel more able to cope.

Over time, distress lessens and life hopefully begins to feel easier, lighter. It has been a privilege to witness this change in people over the course of my career.

Often, as distress reduces, a different question begins to emerge:

What now?

Clients find they are no longer simply trying to get through the week. Instead, they start thinking about making a change, taking on a challenge, becoming more confident at work, starting something new, or pursuing a goal that previously felt out of reach.

This can be an important stage of psychological growth.

When therapy starts to become about the future

As people move through therapy, they often develop a better understanding of themselves and the experiences that have shaped them.

Old fears may become less powerful. Difficult memories may feel more settled. Some notice they are responding differently in relationships, trusting themselves more, or feeling less influenced by anxiety.

And yet, moving forwards can still feel difficult.

You might know what you want to do but find yourself hesitating. Perhaps other people tell you that you are capable, but something still holds you back.

You may notice thoughts such as:

• “I’m not good enough.”

• “I’ll get it wrong.”

• “I can’t do this”

• “Other people will realise I don’t know what I’m doing.”

This is where EMDR-informed coaching can be useful.

What is EMDR-informed coaching?

EMDR, or Eye Movement Desensitisation and Reprocessing, is a psychological therapy most commonly associated with trauma. It helps people process experiences that continue to feel emotionally “stuck”, so that they can be remembered without producing the same level of distress.

EMDR-informed coaching draws on some of the principles and techniques used within EMDR but applies them to a more future-focused piece of work.

Rather than starting with the question, “What’s wrong?”, coaching is more likely to start with:

“Where would you like to go?”

We might identify a goal such as:

• feeling more confident when giving presentations;

• applying for a promotion or changing career;

• becoming more assertive;

• returning to dating after a difficult relationship;

• completing a challenging sporting event;

• starting a business or creative project;

• making an important life decision.

We can then explore what happens psychologically when you imagine yourself moving towards that goal.

Building a picture of the person you want to become

Our responses to new situations are shaped partly by what we have learned from previous ones. However, one of the things I particularly like about this approach is that it is not only about the past.

It is also about building confidence in a future version of yourself.

We might work on imagining yourself entering a difficult meeting feeling calm and grounded, speaking clearly during a presentation, having a conversation you have been avoiding, or completing something that currently feels intimidating.

The aim is not to convince yourself that everything will go perfectly.

Instead, it is to develop a stronger sense of:

“Whatever happens, I can handle it.”

This is often a much more useful form of confidence from which to grow into the person you want to be.

Choosing your direction

One of the changes people sometimes notice through therapy is that their life gradually becomes less about avoiding or managing distress.

When that happens, there can be more space for choice.

Instead of asking:

“How do I stop feeling like this?”

you may begin asking:

“What do I want my life to look like?”

That shift can feel surprisingly unfamiliar.

But it can also be one of the most rewarding parts of therapy.

EMDR-informed coaching offers a way of exploring what you want to move towards, understanding what may still be holding you back, and strengthening the confidence and psychological flexibility needed to take the next step.

If you’re interested in finding out more about EMDR informed coaching, do get in touch, it would be great to hear from you.